Motherhood is a beautiful mess. So many beautiful incidences fill your days, so much so that there won’t be nearly enough time to capture them all, leaving it all a memory, and so special that it’s your memory. But with those beautiful moments come messy moments too. Messy moments when you question…was parenthood the right thing for me? Will I ever be able to sleep again? Am I teaching my children the proper essentials for life? How on Earth could my children possibly act this way?
Well, my dear mama friend, know that this is just a phase.
When you have just given birth you expect only the happiest of times with the arrival of your new little bundle of joy. Now you are suddenly filled with tears, feelings of incapability, and loneliness. Know, novice mama, this is just a phase. You will gain your bearings and these feelings will pass as you learn how to turn your new world right side up. You are the most capable and are surrounded by mothers near and far experiencing these same feelings.
When your sweet baby decides he doesn’t want to sleep any more than a few hours at a time, you’re so desperate for a good night’s sleep. You envy so many mamas with infants that sleep through the night. Know, tired mama, this is just a phase. Your little babe will sleep too one day and shockingly, you will eventually miss those nights of just the two of you rocking in the wee hours.
When you dare yourself, I mean triple dare, to leave the house with a baby in tow to get groceries for the first time and she decides to have that epic inconsolable meltdown in public, know, brave mama, this is just a phase. You will learn her routine, schedule and all the tricks to keep her consoled. And soon enough, she will love to go shopping with you!
When your infant begins to scoot and cruise and you can’t seem to possibly child proof enough, know, cautious mama, this is just a phase. Do your best to hide the harmful things, plug the outlets, and stash the crayons, but know that one day soon, you will be able to turn your head without disaster occurring behind your back. There will be a time when you can multitask without having to watch your child’s every move. It does get easier and much less worrisome.
When your stubborn little person decides that they will no longer eat everything they have loved every day before, know, chef mama, this is just a phase. Don’t worry yourself to insomnia over whether or not their food protests will cause them starvation. They will eat. Eventually. They will learn to like new foods, and old foods again.
When you decide to take a road trip with your little one and you have poop explosions covering the car seat and snacks sprayed all over the back seat, know, traveling mama, this is just a phase. Your infant’s bowel movements will eventually stop crawling up their back and leaking through every crevice possible and your toddler will learn to hold their snacks without the urge to immediately dump them out. Travel will become fun and much less stressful.
When your toddler decides the office supply aisle is the perfect place to hurl you into humiliation with a monstrous tantrum because you wouldn’t buy the scissors, know, embarrassed mama, this is just a phase. Your child will gain self control and you will soon be able to reason with your child. Gradually, you will be able to provide toddler-approved explanations as to why they are not allowed to run with scissors and bargaining will become much more effective.
When your little girl decides that all of those cute outfits you have been dressing her in for all of those years are suddenly “disgusting” and now protests anything but sparkly and twirlable articles of clothing, know, fashion mama, this is just a phase. This one may be an extended phase and/or repeating phase throughout the years, but one day, she will again ask for your opinion.
When your little boy demands his snack while stomping his feet and pounding his fists, know, polite mama, this is just a phase. All of those hours spent repeating please and thank you and re-enforcing manners truly will pay off and this will become evident one day. He will speak to you with these kind words once he learns that those animalistic ways won’t get him anywhere and he knows how to communicate a bit better. And when you overhear your child talking to friend’s parents, his teachers, and the elderly with yes sirs and no m’ams, you will be one proud mama.
So when you feel like you have reached your limit, you can’t take one more mess, one more tantrum, one more sleepless night, just know, strong mama, this is just a phase. Whisper those words, take a deep breath, eat a bowl of ice cream, and embrace each phase because this is what motherhood is all about. It can be a mess, but it will indeed be the most beautiful mess you’ve ever happened upon.