The Real Housewives of…Reality!

stayathomemomknoxville

I have never had this easy of a job, well, ever.

Being a stay at home mom is such a breeze. I wake up in the mornings, brew a fresh pot of coffee, drink a cup in my beloved Rae Dunn mug of choice, then leisurely take a seat and watch one of my favorite Bravo shows. Sometimes, I may take some time to shower before the kids wake up and I get ready for the day. I have fun-filled plans ahead!

First, we will meet up with some other moms and have a fantastic playgroup with our littles. Then afterwards, lunch at Chick-fil-A, then a fabulous stroll through Target. Our FAVE! The kids love going to Target. Who doesn’t, right?!? When we finally make it home after said fun, the kids take a nap and I have all the time in the world to get any chores/laundry done, paint my nails, and if I’m lucky…a nap by myself.

But, let’s be honest. NONE of this is true…let me slap you in the face with some reality.

There is NEVER a morning when I’m not woken up with either my 18 month old yelling “REESE, REESE!!!” (she has never called me mama, it’s always been Reese), OR my four year old son standing right next to my face, staring at me. I literally jumped yesterday morning when I opened my eyes and saw another set of eyes staring back at me. Why do they do that?!? Then the “I’m hungry” start. Like a broken record, over and over. Can I at least drain my bladder after the great night of sleep I’ve had!? That’s another joke. Sleep?? What’s that?? 

Let the day commence…if I’m lucky, I will get a sip of coffee before 10am. Coffee somewhat does the trick to snap me out of my “mombie” like state. Then there is breakfast. All. Morning. Long. For some strange reason, three half-eaten pancakes aren’t enough. They need a banana, strawberries, four animal crackers out of an entire snack bag, and whatever else they can get their hands on. Like mini garbage disposals, except wasting a ton of food on the way. Meanwhile, I’m starving and when (let’s keep it real), IF I finally sit down to eat, they sit in front of me and stare. Until they eventually win and eat half of whatever I’m eating. This isn’t just during breakfast. It’s lunch and dinner too. Anyone else try to eat something quietly so your kids don’t hear? Then realize you’ve lost when they come running like a stampede of elephants down the hallway?

This is my life everyday. To all the judgy moms out there who LOVE to say “I envy you. I WISH I could stay home every day!”…eat your words. I’m not at home eating bonbons, while enjoying my adult shows and relaxing with ease. I’m cleaning the same dang (insert more choice words here) room 12 times a day, changing poop off my child and her sheets, cleaning food off the floor, watching the laundry pile up on the couch, while there is a load in washer and dryer, running my kids to appointments all week, feeding meals, cleaning up said meals from table, chairs, hair, catch my child pull a cracker from under the couch and eat it, taking VERY public bathroom breaks, all while Caillou is playing in the background and I’m looking like a vagabond. There is nothing glamorous here, people. 

therealhousewivesofreality

While I am SO very thankful my husband works hard every single day so that I can spend each day with my babies, it’s no cakewalk! And for those who post pictures of their perfectly clean houses, perfectly cooked meals, and your perfect kids…we know you’re not perfect. Do you know how we know? Cause we are moms too. That picture of your beautiful spic and span house was probably only clean for 12 seconds, until your child realized “OH, a clean spot!! Let me make another mess for you!”

Although it may come across as me complaining about my job of being a stay at home mama, I wouldn’t have it any other way. I get to spend every day with my babies, teach them about life, and watch them grow right before my eyes. I couldn’t be more grateful to have a husband who does so much for our family. Having the opportunity to be home with one’s kids isn’t something that every family has the ability to do. As crazy as my days are, I wouldn’t change one thing!

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14 Responses to The Real Housewives of…Reality!

  1. Jaclyn Levy December 22, 2016 at 8:52 am #

    Isn’t it interesting when someone says, “you’re so lucky to have such and such life” that we respond with, “no, it’s really hard and not what you think.” Why are we all in contest to try to win the “who’s life is hardest” contest? Sure I’m lucky to be a SAHM, but if the cost of child care for 2 kids wasn’t so prohibitive it would be nice to work outside my house for my own paycheck.

  2. Marisa McCroskey
    Marisa McCroskey December 22, 2016 at 9:43 am #

    Thank you for commenting! I agree with you 100%. We need to support eachother more and stop comparing and competing! Not saying that working moms have it easy, I’m sure that hard too. However, we don’t get a lunch break, bathroom break, or any other type of break. We have a 24 hour job that’s not a breeze. It’s hard, it’s exhausting but it’s also the most important job we have:)

  3. Allyn December 22, 2016 at 10:25 am #

    I work full time (and more when the job requires) and I assure you that I just come home and have to do all of the same things that you do. Just because I work doesn’t mean I don’t also have a 24 hour job

    • Holly December 27, 2016 at 10:44 am #

      I totally agree. I hate the comparisons between working moms and SAHM’s! The reality is we ALL work hard and have all chosen to be where we are. The assumption that all working moms get a lunch break is not different than working moms assuming that SAHMs sit in their PJ’s and watch soap operas all day! I can assure you that most working moms in retail or the medical field are expected to work thru a lunch break (labor laws don’t apply if you are salaried or deemed highly compensated by the government) and on the rare occasion we do get a break, it’s usually spent trying to get online to pay the bills, grab a few non-perishable groceries for dinner that night or a birthday gift for an upcoming birthday party, or even running to school to pick up your child to take them to a dentist appointment or yearly physical because daycare doesn’t do that part. We don’t get to sit down and eat most days either and are fortunate to get a pee break even once in a 8-10 hr shift. We come home from work and cook dinners, do laundry, help with homework, do bath time and bed time routines only to finally climb in bed at midnight and repeat. I, chose to pay a housekeeper once a month as a treat to myself, but there’s still much more cleaning that has to be done in between and that’s usually accomplished in the evenings or on my “days off”…whatever that means. The “days off” typically look like grocery shopping, cleaning all day, meal planning, paying bills, going to games for my kids and spending as much quality time with the kiddos as possible since we have so much mommy guilt from working and truly miss our kiddos while we aren’t home. Trust me, that my days off do not look like a working mom going for a mani/pedi, getting my hair done, and a massage. It’s also true that we don’t get any sleep during the night because we are still moms and deal with the same night time battles that SAHMs do (mommy, I had a nightmare…mommy, I want to sleep with you…mommy, I wet the bed) except that we are expected to wake up and put on our happy face with the customer/patient and in my specific profession, I pray daily that I don’t harm anyone by making a mistake with their medical treatment because going to prison for an accidental death or being sued for malpractice wasn’t the goal I had when first getting up to drive into work that morning. I am certainly not trying to start a fight here because, as I stated earlier, we all work hard and have chosen our own path. I just feel compelled to say that working moms feel just as judged by SAHMs who think they have it harder than we do. It shouldn’t be a battle.

      • Marisa
        Marisa December 27, 2016 at 10:53 am #

        Thanks for your comment Holly. As said in earlier comments, this post was in no way, shape or form saying that working moms have it easier. It was a peek into the life of a SAHM. Another point I was trying to make, in reference to being a SAHM is we don’t get to interact with other adults or get a break from little ones throughout the day. I worked retail for 10 years as salary, so I know what it’s like to work 40 plus hours a day. I had adult conversations, I was able to squeeze in a quick break and potty breaks without other sets of eyeballs staring at me. This was my story and not a “working moms vs. SAHM” post. The fact is, we don’t get a break, aka, a drive to work alone, or anything and we also cook meals, take kids to dr appointments, clean, etc just the same as working moms. No one is comparing the two. We all work hard, but do different jobs throughout the day.

  4. Marisa
    Marisa December 22, 2016 at 10:38 am #

    I am sure you have just as hard of a job as the rest of us. My point was referring to the ladies out there that make comments on how they wish they can stay at home, like we do nothing. I was saying that our job is a 24 hour job, meaning that we don’t get a second away from all the craziness of our children. As stay at home mamas, our job is 24 hours a day, 7 days a week with no break from “toddlerisms”, fighting, pooping, cleaning up a child’s mess, etc. This post was in no way, shape, or form meant to discredit working moms. We all have hard jobs as mamas. This was just a peek into what we deal with, being home with children, all day, day in and day out.

  5. Lindsay Burchette December 22, 2016 at 10:42 am #

    Great post, Marisa! Thanks for sharing your perspective <3

  6. Marisa
    Marisa December 22, 2016 at 10:43 am #

    Thanks so much, Lindsay! I’m glad you liked it:)

    • Lindsay Burchette December 22, 2016 at 12:00 pm #

      I did! I think it’s important that we share our own experiences through our own eyes- it doesn’t take away from what anyone else is doing, but there’s room for all voices. Thanks for sharing yours!

      • Marisa
        Marisa December 22, 2016 at 1:00 pm #

        Absolutely, Lindsay. We all have different stories to tell. This was my story and just that. I also believe that working moms have it hard, but in a different way. Not that my job as a SAHM is any harder than anyone else’s, but a much different kind of job than a mom that does work.

  7. Ashley
    Ashley December 22, 2016 at 10:45 am #

    Amen sister. Staying home is way harder than people realize. When I worked outside the home I had an hour for lunch, several breaks here and there to recharge, adults to interact with, etc. now I feel like I am working 24/7 and always on call.

    • Marisa
      Marisa December 22, 2016 at 1:01 pm #

      It’s true! No lunch breaks OR even a bathroom break without an audience! Lol

  8. Christine Derr
    Christine Derr December 22, 2016 at 10:57 am #

    The very public bathroom habits- OMG yes! ? Sometimes I sneak to get the mail while they’re distracted so I can have 14 seconds to myself! Great post!

  9. Marisa
    Marisa December 22, 2016 at 1:06 pm #

    Christine, I can relate 100%!! Sneaky mail breaks happen here too…but then the kids realize mom’s missing and start banging on the front window when the gig is up. And the bathroom breaks….I literally had my 18 month old daughter reach under the bathroom sink and place tampons, cans of hairspray, every bottle of body lotion, into the top part of my pants. This was during one of those “extra long” bathroom sessions”, if you catch my drift. I had the entire bathroom cabinet inside my pant legs until the sesh was over!!

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